Michael J. Tresca gave 4 stars to: Dank Cells, The

Michael J. Tresca reviewed:

Dank Cells, The by Pre-Painted Fantasy Terrain 28mm

A tough cell, November 24, 2014

This review is from: Dank Cells, The (Sports)

Talien (AKA Tal) the satyr paladin and Maleficent (AKA Mal) the half-fiend/half-fey sorceress are scoping out the set of their new show -- with a special look at Legendary Realms' terrain, Dank Dungeon Cells and Accessory Pack.



Tal: I like this place. It has character. I think it will make a great new set for our upcoming super secret new show.



Mal: No.



Tal: Oh come on, Keep an open mind! Look at this place -- it has doors, beds...



Mal: ONE bed. This is a dungeon, you realize? It's right there in the title. DUNG-eon. Notice the first part. And the buckets in each cell. Ugh.



Tal: I prefer to think of it as a bunch of cozy studio apartments.



Mal: Are you a vagrant? Because only a homeless person would think that.



Tal: But look at how much the place has improved! The production crew has done an amazing job of painting this to resemble the Dwarven Forge tiles.



Mal: So basically, this place is less uglier than it started. That's not really an improvement.



Tal: Look at this luxurious bed...



Mal: I can't stop looking at the ten buckets.



Tal: Well you need to go somewhere...



Mal: There are only six cells, unless you count the seventh SUPER-SPACIOUS cell that barely fits the bed in it. I say again: TEN BUCKETS.



Tal: And these steel doors. The detail!



Mal: You do realize that there are no windows in them? It's pitch black when you close the door.



Tal: I like it dark when I sleep.



Mal: And during the day?



Tal: It's very secure.



Mal: You're just not going to give up are you?



Tal: I can do this all day.



Mal: Okay fine.



Tal: Fine let's use this set?



Mal: No. Fine, I'm not doing this with you. Pick another set or I'm not doing your stupid show.



Tal: Well, I knew it was a tough "cell." Get it?



Mal: ...



Tal: Wow you must really be angry. On to the next set!

Michael J. Tresca gave 3 stars to: Wizard's Scrying Chamber

Michael J. Tresca reviewed:

Wizard's Scrying Chamber by Pre-Painted Fantasy Terrain 28mm

Beware the algae!, November 24, 2014

This review is from: Wizard's Scrying Chamber (Toy)

Talien (AKA Tal) the satyr paladin and Maleficent (AKA Mal) the half-fiend/half-fey sorceress are scoping out the set of their new show -- with a special look at Legendary Realms' terrain, Arcane Scrying Chamber and Accessory Pack.



Tal: Okay, so maybe the Dark Dungeon Cells wasn't your cup of tea, but this place...



Mal: What's that smell?



Tal: Look at that majestic fountain!



Mal: You realize you have to clean the fountain. What's that in the fountain?



Tal: The beautiful green patina?



Mal: That's algae. Gross.



Tal: And look at all this reading material! What beautiful craftsmanship on this bookshelf. It would make a nice backdrop for--



Mal: I don't think so.



Tal: Well you can at least scry on people. Wouldn't that be fun?



Mal: We can't fit large guests in the room. And it still smells like wet dog in here. Or is that wet goat?



Tal: Believe it or not, I am not the cause of your nasal distress today.



Mal: Today.



Tal: So no on this room?



Mal: You almost sold me on the algae-covered fountain that hasn't been turned on in centuries.



Tal: Is that a no? I can't tell anymore. Where are you going? Okay, so that's a no...

Michael J. Tresca gave 4 stars to: Deadrising 3 Sledgesaw Hammer Pen Miniature Replica October 2014 Lootcrate Exclusive

Michael J. Tresca reviewed:

Deadrising 3 Sledgesaw Hammer Pen Miniature Replica October 2014 Lootcrate Exclusive by Capcom

a nice conversation piece at your desk, November 24, 2014

This review is from: Deadrising 3 Sledgesaw Hammer Pen Miniature Replica October 2014 Lootcrate Exclusive (Toy)

Loot Crate is a monthly service in which you receive geek-friendly merchandise at a discount, grouped around a particular theme. This month’s theme was Fear, which is an opportunity to throw in everything about monsters and zombies the Loot Crate team could think of. I divvy up the Crate amongst my seven-year-old boy and four-year-old girl. This pen is the highlight of the set, a cobbled-together weapon that's also a pen from the video game Dead Rising. This quote from my review of the first game summarizes my love/hate relationship with Dead Rising:



"DAY 44: I did it! I beat the main bad guy by spinning around like a top, backslapping the bad guy with what has to be the stupidest move in gaming combat history. But I beat Dead Rising! Take that, only-one-save slot! Take that, crashing-all-the-time processor! Take that, stupid forced story-timeline! I did it! I did it! Did I mention I love this game?"



Dead Rising is known for taking Ash's insane gadgetry from the "Evil Dead" series (and "Army of Darkness" specifically) and applying it to the zombie game genre. And what more could you ask for than a buzzsaw connected to a sledgehammer? Practical, amIrite?



Anyway, the buzzsaw doesn't spin. It's the first thing I tried to do when I opened the box. My son did the same thing, so it seems like the natural response to seeing a buzzsaw is testing if it moves with your finger. The pen disconnects so that the buzzsaw acts as the cover, and the sledgehammer is the pen. This is a little impractical -- the buzzsaw is easy to lose as it doesn't go on the other end of the sledgehammer. The pen is also very light. But on the plus side you can whack your coworkers in the forehead with this faux sledgehammer and not do any damage. Cons include the pen being useless against zombies.



I like it. Not sure how much I'll use it, but it makes for a nice conversation piece at your desk.

Michael J. Tresca gave 1 star to: Mega Man Mini Helmet Replica Grey Nov Loot Crate Exclusive Capcom Smash Bros.

Michael J. Tresca reviewed:

Mega Man Mini Helmet Replica Grey Nov Loot Crate Exclusive Capcom Smash Bros.

Where's the rest of him?, November 24, 2014

This review is from: Mega Man Mini Helmet Replica Grey Nov Loot Crate Exclusive Capcom Smash Bros.

Loot Crate is a monthly service in which you receive geek-friendly merchandise at a discount, grouped around a particular theme. This month’s theme was Battle, which is pretty much a video game focus on a handful of first-person shooters and scrolling beat-em-ups. I divvy up the Crate amongst my seven-year-old boy and four-year-old girl. The girl wanted the helmet...until she opened the box.



As my daughter put it, "where's the rest of him?" This is another one of those collectibles, like the coin, that doesn't really do anything. For a crate all about battling, there's a remarkable number of non-functioning items, and this helmet is a new low. It's not a Mega Man figure, it's just his helmet. That's it. Just a helmet.



Oh you can get a variety of Mega Man 2 colors (red, green, blue, gray), but it's JUST A HELMET. It comes with a stand, so you can show your helmet off. You can't play with this (or even beat someone up with it, although I suppose if you chuck it at a sibling hard enough it will make a dent), so it gets one star.

Michael J. Tresca gave 5 stars to: Ninjas Vs Pirates Lootcrate November Shirt Medium

Michael J. Tresca reviewed:

Ninjas Vs Pirates Lootcrate November Shirt Medium

For fans of pirates. Or ninjas. Or both., November 24, 2014

This review is from: Ninjas Vs Pirates Lootcrate November Shirt Medium

Loot Crate is a monthly service in which you receive geek-friendly merchandise at a discount, grouped around a particular theme. This month’s theme was Battle, which is pretty much a video game focus on a handful of first-person shooters and scrolling beat-em-ups. I divvy up the Crate amongst my seven-year-old boy and four-year-old girl. The boy immediately seized this shirt and ran away with it.



Long-time Loot Crate fans have seen this before. It's basically a character made out of words. In this case, it's two different characters put together, so you get two different sets of words in the shape of pirates and ninjas. For a seven-year-old boy, this is pretty much nirvana -- even if the shirt is practically dress-sized on him (when are you going to offer kids sizes, Loot Crate?).



If you're not a fan of ninjas and pirates, you won't like this shirt. Then again, if you don't like at least one of those archetypes, why are you subscribing to Loot Crate? The boy gave it five stars.